Becoming a Healthier Me – Journal Entry 1/22/13

“So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.”  1 Corinthians 9:26-27

Wow, those scriptures hit me on the head like a ton of bricks!  How can I be an example to others if I am not discipline enough in my own life?

As I begin my journey to a Healthier Me, I have been undertaking a great amount of soul searching- introspection - and I have to be honest with myself, “I have a lot of splainin to do!” (To coin a phrase from Ricky Ricardo on I Love Lucy). 

I have restarted – jumped started – my battle of the bulge.  I am reading the book Winning the Battle of the Bulge It’s NOT About the Weight, along with the study guide, by Mary Englund Murphy.  She compares the battle of dieting or the battle of bulge to that of being a soldier in the Army.  Actually she says that “Losing weight is not just a battle; it’s a war – a lifelong war made up of daily battles.  Battles fought not at the refrigerator, the dinner table, or the cookie jar, but in our minds and spirits.  Battles fought against an enemy we seldom recognize and with weapons we are disinclined to use.  You may feel ready to surrender, but don’t give up yet.  Together we will enlist in God’s army, work our way through boot camp and special training, recognize our true enemy, and allow God to arm us with weapons to win the war.” 

One of the questions she asks is: “List attitude adjustments you need to make.”  You mean I need an attitude adjustment?  Not me?  I can just see my husband and sister rolling their eyes right now!  Of course I need an attitude adjustment.  So here I go – I am opening myself up to everyone to help me become more accountable. 

1.       I need to commit to the battle as a life-long battle.  Losing weight is not about dieting and reaching your goal.  It is a life-long commitment to be and stay healthy.  Healthy physically, mentally and spiritually. 

2.       Be honest.  When I record in my food diary I must be honest and record every bite.  I must be honest with myself and most of all with my Lord – the Commander in Chief of His army. 

3.       Be positive.  I cannot tell you how many times I look into the mirror and say, “You are ugly, You are fat, You are worthless, You are pathetic, You are….”  Well you get the idea.  I say and think a lot of negatives when it comes to how I see myself – inside and out. 

4.       Food is not my enemy – but my thoughts and feelings towards food are my enemy.

5.       When I reach a plateau or even not lose as fast I think I should lose, I am not to get discouraged and give up as I usually do.  I didn’t get this way overnight and I cannot expect it to come off overnight either.  There are lessons to learn at every step forward and every plateau.  Instead of giving up – seek guidance – from the Lord and nutritionist. 

6.       The life long battle will get difficult, challenging, and road blocks from the deceiver himself but I must remember that the Lord is in the battle with me; He will and can help me through and around each battle – each challenge the enemy sets out for me. 

Yes, I am in a lifelong battle, but I must remember that I am on the Winner’s side – God – The Battle is already won – the prize is there at the finish line just waiting for me to run my course and cross that finish line to claim my prize!    

I hope that one day I can say as the Apostle Paul wrote in 2 Timothy 4:6-8, “As for me, my life has already been poured out as an offering to God. The time of my death is near. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing.”

Dear Heavenly Father, You have armed me with strength for the battle of bulge.  Everything I need to fight this battle you have already provided.  It’s mine for the taking – I must use the weapons you provide to fight the battles that will come my way.  "In Your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall." Psalm 18:29.  And all God’s people say, “Amen!”